Juvenile Humor

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Yesterday, my younger son, D-, and I were riding in the car heading over to the Home Depot. We were commenting on all those pesky yard signs advertising political candidates.

We saw a bunch of signs for this guy. He's running for some sort of elected judge position.

I said to D- "Look at that guy running for judge. How do you think he pronounces his last name? Do you think it's the way "Super-MAN", "Bat-MAN", and "Spider-MAN" pronounce their names? Do you think he pronounces his last name "Tit-MAN"?"

D- rolled his eyes and started blushing.

"Tit-MAN, Tit-MAN, Tit-MAN. How would you like to go through life with Tit-MAN as your last name? Just imagine when they called roll in class... Is D- Tit-MAN present? Is there a Tit-MAN in the room?"

"I don't think he pronounces it that way" said D- getting redder. "It's probably pronounced Titmun."

"I once knew a guy by the name of Glass-COCK. How would you like that for your last name? D- Glass-COCK. How's that sound? Then there's the old football player Dick Butt-Kiss. How's that for a name?"

More eye rolling and embarrassment.

"And could you even have a vanity license plate with "Tit-MAN" on it? Would the Maryland DMV actually let you drive around with "Tit-MAN" on your car? Even if it is your last name? It would be sort of like that Ass-MAN episode on Seinfeld."

"They probably wouldn't let you have a SPACE in it!"

D- had reached his exasperation limit. I let it drop. I laughed all the way to Home Depot.
K-

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4 Comments

Dan said:

This reminds me of the Seinfeld "Assman" -- pronounced MAN -- episode.

Dan said:

I mean, I too am reminded of the Seinfeld Assman episode.

S

Rob said:

There was a local Ford dealership in New Orleans. The owner's name was Dick Bohn. I don't think I'd have ever ventured into the schoolyard.

Marie said:

Despite his discomfort, I bet D- puts his own kid through something similar some day.

That Titman's gonna be hard to top. There used to be a family around here named Casabeer. I don't know how it was supposed to be pronounced, but everyone said, Case-A-Beer. Speaking of beer, don't forget the good ol' Griesedieck Brewery.

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This page contains a single entry by Kem White published on August 28, 2006 5:30 PM.

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